Self Esteem and Stress

SELF ESTEEM ISSUES

How do you feel about yourself right now? You probably would balk at the idea of abusing someone that you adore and love. On the same hand you should wonder why you would abuse your body with lack of exercise, poor eating habits, and other bad behaviors which are to your detriment. The process of maintaining an unhealthy lifestyle is an ongoing process. You may start out by slipping into an unhealthy lifestyle because of something that makes you feel a little less sure of yourself - such as a bad breakup or something equally demeaning - and then as you get less and less healthy your self esteem goes lower and lower. As a result you wind up allowing your health to slip more and more, and then you eventually wind up at a point where your health is poor and your self esteem is worse.

Of course, this may not describe your situation at all… maybe you have fairly good health and you are simply trying to find some motivation to improve your health even more. If you are in a situation where your health and self esteem are concurrently low, however, then you need to realize that there is a definite correlation between the two. This is actually good news, though, because as your health increases, there is a good chance that your self esteem will increase too! When you take the time to care properly for your body you can't help but feel better about yourself in more ways than one. So you should understand that even if you feel relatively low about yourself right now there is certainly hope for your situation. If you have a hard time getting motivated to begin treating your body better then try to keep in mind that you will not only be helping your health, but your self esteem as well. Consider it a nice bonus for your hard work.

Even if you look okay, are you okay with yourself? Maybe you don't really have a problem with being overweight or underweight, and if that's true then you should consider yourself fortunate. Just because your weight is fine, however, does not mean that your self esteem is where it should be. This is not to say that getting healthy is an absolutely concrete way to solve any self esteem issues you may have, but you should really take the time to examine how you feel about yourself even if your body shape is ideal by current cultural standards. Sometimes it can actually be more difficult for people to get motivated to follow a healthier lifestyle when they don't have a body image that needs vast improvement.

Someone who appears to be of an ideal weight may find that friends and family balk at the effort, saying things like "you look great, what are you worried about?" or "stop obsessing about how you look." What these people need to realize - and perhaps what you need to realize as well - is that being healthy is not just about how you look on the outside. You may look fabulous on the outside, but if you often feel like you don't have enough energy to get through your day, or if you often feel sad, depressed, or restless, you may be able to improve your emotional well-being along with your physical well-being. For this reason, you should not allow yourself to lose the motivation to get healthier just because you like what you see in the mirror. "Better health" does not merely refer to your physical appearance…it means much more, like your emotional well-being and your ability to get through your day without aches and pains (physical and emotional).

Self-destructive behavior is not conducive to a healthy lifestyle. You may read that sentence and think to yourself, "Well, I'm not cutting myself with razor blades, so I'm not doing anything self-destructive." Self-destructive behavior is much more than simply overtly and intentionally hurting yourself. Do you do any of these things?

• Do you smoke cigarettes or anything else?
• Do you drink alcohol more than you should?
• Do you eat food even after you are full?
• Do you constantly consume foods that aren't good for you?
• Do you avoid doctors, even when you are truly ill?
• Do you engage in unprotected sex?
• Do you exercise to the point of exhaustion on a constant basis?
• Do you use illicit drugs and prescription pills beyond their intended use?
• Do you avoid physical activity?
• Do you live or work in an environment where you are bombarded by toxins?

As you can see, self destructive behavior is not limited to intentional behavior. The list is much more extensive than is listed here, of course, but this brief listing should get you thinking about the decisions you make and how they affect your overall health. If you are emotionally troubled - and not just in a clinical sense; perhaps you just have some issues that are troubling you that you can't shake - then this may have an effect on the rest of your health. Most mental health experts will tell you that mental issues often manifest into physical issues, so if you know that you are engaging in self destructive behavior that is bad for your health, but you aren't entirely sure why you're doing it, then perhaps the first place to look is to your emotional well-being. If you have some issues to work out then you may have to do that before any attempt at getting motivated to improve your health is going to have any profound effect on your life.

Better health is not limited to how many laps you can run without getting winded or how often you can wake up without the flu. Your health is an all-inclusive system that needs to include your emotional health as well as your physical health. You can't ignore the issues that may be slowing you down. You will probably find that once you address any emotional problems or issues that need your attention everything else will start to fall into place. Think of your emotional and physical health as one system with many parts…and remember that one part relies on the other to function well so that the entire system can function at its best.

 ANGER MANAGEMENT, STRESS REDUCTION, AND ZEN

Have you ever met a very healthy angry person? Years ago, people were lumped into two categories: Type A and Type B. Type A personalities were people who were aggressive and sometimes quite angry in their pursuits while Type B personalities were much more passive and content with life in general. Although these categories aren't referred to as much anymore, there was a valid point made by these groupings. People who fell into the category of being Type A personalities often achieved plenty because of their go-getter nature, but these were also the same people who keeled over with heart attacks at young ages because of the constant stress they put their minds and bodies through.

The nature versus nurture debate argued whether the type of personality people have is something that they own genetically and can't alter, or if instead is something that is formed over the years and can be changed with concerted effort. The fact of the matter is that people can indeed change…you may not be able to completely overhaul your personality but there are certainly things that you can do that will allow you to be a little less angry (even if being angry is how you have always been).

The operative words are concerted effort. You probably can't just wake up one day and decide that you are going to flip a complete one hundred and eighty degree turn from how you have always been. Instead, you will need to figure out what it is you want to change about your personality and then set about changing it. How do you decide what needs to be changed? The answer is quite simple really; figure out what personality traits you have that are detrimental to your well-being. If you stomp around in a fury all the time then you probably have physical and emotional consequences that you have to deal with in addition to problems in your relationships.

Conversely, if you squeak along in a meek and apologetic way then you probably have consequences to deal with as well. If you are too angry all the time then look into an anger management course. If you are too passive then look into assertiveness training. If you are too emotional then there are programs designed to assist you in not taking everything so much to heart, and there is sensitivity training for people who really need to work on showing their emotions more effectively. Whatever your issue, there is a program designed to help you conquer the problem and live a healthier life. If you need motivation to do one of these programs then just remember that your physical body is affected by your emotional demeanor. Getting healthier has as much to do with your emotional health as it does with your physical health. You can't ignore one and only work on the other.

You can reduce your stress in different ways. The great thing about learning how to reduce your stress is that there are countless ways to do it. That means that if you try a method like deep breathing or visualization and find that it just doesn't work for you then you can rest assured that there are plenty of other methods to try. Once you find the method that works for you then make sure you use it when you need it. If you have a problem with getting anxious in social situations but find that singing a certain song as a calming trigger helps you immensely then don't toss this method aside just because you feel silly about relying on a song to keep you calm. As long as your method works then it shouldn't seem silly… it should feel like a God-send.

Don't lose hope if you can't find an effective method to help your particular situation right off the bat; some people simply need to try several methods before they are able to find something that works well for them. Just know that there are plenty of very smart people in the world who are paid very well just to figure out ways that other people like you can function well in the world. Any stroll through the self-help section of a bookstore will prove to you that there is no shortage of methods to help people reduce stress.

It may be that you don't necessarily need some magical method but you simply need to drop some of the obligations that you deal with throughout your day. If you're already a busy person then don't feel bullied into volunteering for some huge project that won't better your life whatsoever. If you need motivation to say no to tasks that people try to saddle you with then try to remember that stress has a physiological affect on you as well as a psychological effect, so if you have any hope of living a healthier lifestyle then you need to make a move to reduce the amount of stress that you deal with on a daily basis in your life.

Have a little faith. Research shows that people who regularly attend some place of worship and who live a spiritual lifestyle can be healthier and live longer than their societal counterparts who do not engage in worship activities. Whether these people live healthier lives because they are following the rules set forth by their place of worship or if it is because they are more at peace than other people as a result of their faith, you should know that actively engaging in some form of worship is generally considered to be one way to live a healthier and more satisfying life. This is certainly not to say that people who do not engage in some form of worship live empty lives, but if you have an interest in some form of spiritualism then now is the time to hop in and see if a certain place of worship is a good fit for your beliefs.

Not only can you increase your socialization exponentially but you may be able to find more peace in your daily existence depending upon what place of worship you choose to attend. Although it probably goes without saying, it will still be said: avoid any place of worship that encourages you to engage in activities which are detrimental to your health. Yes, being actively involved in worshipping is generally considered to be good for your overall health, but if the place of worship you choose is a place where they whip out venomous snakes when the time comes to worship then you're heading toward trouble.

On the next page we will conclude by talking about how Health is an Ongoing Process.